
An unhappy camper dropped a comment recently on Tabs Out regarding the blog style. It was left in the comment section of the
Coldstream /
VIKOMT split C60 review, but I think it was meant for the write ups in general. Quoted:
"i still don't understand why "packaging" is so important to people. or spending a paragraph to review artwork. is necessary. you gonna listen to the soundz or are you just gonna get stoned an stare at an album cover..."
Forget about the fact that the two are in no way mutually exclusive. The question is: Is it necessary? Fuck no. Duh. Are any of these stupid reviews actually necessary? I don't think Karl Rove could assemble a think tank to convince a single person that they are. Hell, I don't think there is a remote chance that Stephen Hawking could get the magic robot that lives in his wheelchair to come up with a single explanation as to why the world needs some unemployed smart ass in Delaware to ramble on about such culturally important objects as the latest
Tusco Embassy batch. BUT, if I am going to broadcast such rambles on the
internets, I'm not going to ignore the fact that tapes comes with things like "covers" and "artwork". I don't know about you, but when I grip a new tape the first thing I see is the cover. If that shit looks stupid, is cut all jacked up, or comes in one of those stupid fucking sandwich baggies, then I am immediately like "come on, man". So, to not mention that would be pretty stupid, don't you agree? I see it as a whole package deal.
But you know what? That input actually really got me thinking. Got the old brain blades spinning in the head fan. So naturally, and this is what I assume the reader wanted, I got stoned and stared at tapes. No sounds in the room, just straight stared at, specifically, the spines of the cassettes
chillin' out on the built-in bookcases over there (
I'm pointing at them now). This went on for, I don't know... Ten minutes... An hour... I have a horrible sense of time. I did, however, have a blast rocking some spine-time.
One of the things that stuck out during the session was the transition of artwork over time for some labels, like the Catholic Tapes color to b&w move, and the more noticeable
Excitebike transformation. I'm not rocking an extensive amount of the
ExBx catalog, but what I do have displays a nice time line; Teens starting off with solid color paper, black printing, with the same bold font. Then, in
ExBx mid-life, there is a switch to hand writing, a baby step to the jangly, sharpie seizure tags those slices got now. I know I've said in the past that a steady hand on the spines is the way to go, and I stand by that, but it's also cool to see artistic styles develop over time. Sure, I enjoy it when labels hold it homogeneous, but when they can slowly evolve a look over time and keep it cool, that is a nice track to take. Not that throwing it all over the place is a bad thing. I can totally get into a
hodge podge flying out of
HQs, as long as it's not thrown together with 0% care. One thing that will trip up the smooth vibes is if a label with a perpetual layout all of a sudden drops in a weirdo. It would be like a noise cassette Duck Duck Goose match. When someone finally yells "Goose" shit goes nuts, so I think science has proven me correct on that one. It's no longer an opinion, get it in the books. Oh, and I don't want to hear an excuse like you're using those flimsy cases so that is why your tapes don't have spines. I'm calling you out,
Madak! That shit wont fly!!

I also dig when labels blaze some sort of logo in the same position on the spine every time. It keeps a solid consistency for my eyeballs to latch onto, acting like dominoes that don't domino anywhere.
Domin-
NOs. Maybe it's a primal urge to put shit in order that draws me to this feature. I can put all of my cassettes in one spot. Then take it a step further and put them into some sort of catalog order. Then I can go that extra step and put a bunch of tribal markings all in a row. It's beauty, and a rather calming exercise. I'm not saying it's going to make any tape sound better, but that's not what I'm talking about anyway.

Then you get fools that try to feed some blank shit!? What!? Now, that doesn't mean that tapes with blank spines can't be killers, all of the anonymous cassettes below are really good, but right away you're taking a back seat to those who identify themselves up front. When I go to grab something off the shelf with nothing in mind, just a random jam, I'm steady skipping over the unidentifiable bodies until I find something that sparks a match. Out of sight, out of mind. And when you're hidden in plain view, that's a whammy. Oh, first person to name all three tapes pictured below gets a prize.

Another random fact from spine-time not to miss out on: I stack all of my
RRR Recycled tapes in color coordinated sections. I tried to mix and match, but that only lasted for about a day before I went crazy and had to change em back. I'm pretty stoked on the pink, green, and purple ones, but most of series I have are your standard gray. Then you have the A.H.P.N. recycled tape. The A.H.P.N. (
not actually sure who that is) doesn't have duct tape at all, which is blasphemy in my book. When you think about recycled tapes, the duct tape is the first thing you think of... At least it is for me, second being thoughts about what 80's rock or country music is still intact under the new material. So what I'm saying is I almost want to get rid of that tape, just because it doesn't have the full treatment, or at least separate it from the pack until Ron is kind enough to send me a replacement. Visually, it's the ugly duckling of the group, but it's not even a swan. Just an ugly duck. The power of the spine. Brutal.

I'm running low on gas here, so I'm gonna call it a day. I have no doubts that people, if they even bother to read this, will find things to disagree with or think that what I said is simply fucking stupid. But one thing that I think we can all come together on is that this was, in no way at all, necessary. Now go, my friends, look at your spines before it is to late! (
MAH)